It's about 9:45pm on a Sunday night. Day two of my "staycation." And so far, I've been splattered with pureed green beans and pureed beef, soaked with bath water that likely had pee in it, smudged with poo during an icky diaper change, and slapped multiple times with a fat little hand saturated with baby spit. So, yea... today wasn't really that bad.
Let's just get right down to it... shall we?
Food: (I like how I pretend to have some kind of format for my posts lately...)
*hides face* *slowly raises a pathetic white flag and waves it around shamefully*
I'm at a complete and total loss. Still. I can't get this kid to eat table food other than Cheerios, toast, and bananas. She'll eat almost any pureed fruit and some pureed veggies, especially anything with sweet potatoes in it. Otherwise, it's a no-go. I tried giving her some steamed sweet peas tonight, and when I popped one in her mouth, she gave me this look as if to say "really, mom?" and spit it out. Then refused to let anything else pass her lips. Ugh. I tried giving her a hard-boiled egg yesterday morning and she had some of the yoke, but gagged a little and refused more. Even with the Cheerios and toast, she still doesn't eat a whole lot (and ends up feeding the majority of what's on her tray to the dog) and most of her food is still baby purees and cereal. So if anyone has any advice on how the heck to get an overly gaggy, very picky and STUBBORN baby to transition to table foods and textures, I'm all ears. Or eyes, if you write it to me.
Sleep: Well... things had been going very well until tonight. She entered into a sleep regression at about 11 months of age when she learned how to sit herself up on her own. She only ended up night waking for a handful of nights and was eventually able to get herself back to sleep with little fussing in the wee hours of the morning. My solution at bedtime was to start rocking her to sleep again- she had pretty much refused to let me do that for a while, so I would plop her into her crib after her bottle and she would happily put herself to sleep. So when the regression hit, I started putting her in her crib when she was fully asleep, and it worked like a charm. I also didn't mind doing it anyways, because I love holding her and spending that time with her. But I decided that I'd try to start weaning her from the nighttime rocking by slowly decreasing the amount of time I rock her after she's asleep, leading up to putting her in bed before she's asleep. I planned to try doing that slowly throughout the week (since I have the week off from work), but she wasn't really interested in going to sleep in my arms tonight- consequently, that is the LAST TIME I'm giving her fruit for dinner. Rookie mom mistake. So I put her in her crib while she was fully awake but sleepy, and she sat herself up as I expected. As I left her room, she started to whine and eventually began crying. I watched her on the monitor to see if she'd settle down, but she pulled herself up to standing and her crying escalated, so I went in to soothe her. She still wasn't interested in sleeping, and much preferred trying to pull my face off, rip out my hair, and repeatedly slap my chest, in between playing with her own foot and telling me some kind of bedtime story that I didn't quite understand. So I put her in her crib again, and the whining began the instant her little bum touched the mattress. I sat on the floor, hoping it would keep her calm enough that she'd put herself to sleep. It kept her calm, but sleep was out of the question. Instead, she partied- laughing, squealing, pulling up to standing, bouncing, and babbling like a drunken fool. I left the room, and the crying started. No, not crying... more like wailing. And then the worst thing happened...
In the midst of the wailing, she started saying "mama." She has never said it before, with the exception of some random and meaningless babbling. There are no words to describe the ache I felt in my heart when I heard my little angel crying hysterically and saying "mama" repeatedly. I did smile a bit and laugh to myself, realizing that my stubborn little independent firecracker of a kid said my name for the first time ever when she was desperate for me to come get her. Well played, child. In all seriousness, though, I finally felt like she realized that she needs me and
wanted me to be with her. For the first eleven months of her life, she seemed to think she was pretty self-sufficient. Needless to say, I marched back into her room and rocked her until she fell asleep in my arms.
Unfortunately, the story doesn't end there. She somehow woke up about five minutes after I put her down and pulled herself up again, while crying and saying "mama." This time, I could tell she was exhausted, so I let her fuss herself to sleep... but I did feel pretty bad about it :(
Development: Crazy Baby took off like a rocket over the last month... within three weeks of crawling for the first time, she was pulling up on furniture, climbing on top of the laundry basket, and cruising around on furniture/the pack n play. She takes some drunk steps if you hold her arms but she has zero interest in walking since crawling is so novel to her still. She mimics really well too- tonight, she learned how to take a deep breath and scrunch up her nose. She can also just take in a deep breath through her nose if you do it first, then laughs afterwards. If you say "yay" she claps, say "no" and she shakes her head, and can click her tongue on the top of her palette if you do it first. She discovered her tongue in the mirror and likes sticking it out while watching herself do so. She still says "puppy" and now, apparently, "mama." I think she may also try to say "bottle," which, of course, comes out as "ba-ba." The thing that kills me about her poor eating habits is that she is fully capable of eating like a big girl- we have these "waffle wheel" snacks made by Gerber and she actually likes them (they're sweet, go figure. We give them to her after some of her meals because the're big and I figured they'd help her learn to take bites out of things. No big deal- she took to it right away. Her motor skills are just fine for eating like a toddler- she can pick up small pieces and bite off pieces of larger things. Hmph.
Big girl stuff: Remember how I was so terrified of SIDS that I thought if I breathed wrong, something bad would happen? I'm finally relaxing because she's definitely old enough and far enough along with her development that I think she'll be ok. But I don't regret for a single second my choice to stick to the SIDS recommendations. Up until now, she NEVER slept with anything soft- no soft or fluffy blankets, no blankets at all aside from being swaddled, no stuffed animals, no pillows- and was always on her back on a firm mattress. The only time she slept in mommy and daddy's bed was when she was a teeny newborn and I had her sleep on my chest a couple of times when she was fussy in the morning, but only for about an hour at a time. But now, she's a big girl and rapidly approaching toddlerdom. She sleeps on her tummy by choice, but I still put her on her back at night because it's easier for me that way. She typically flips herself over at some point in the night. I just turned her mattress today so that she's sleeping on the softer side now, and we've had a lovey (which we're switching out soon) in her crib at night lately. So... goodbye, SIDS rules! :) We also had to put the carseat straps at the top notch and she's about to grow out of her infant seat and move on to the convertible kind. And she wears big-girl two-piece jammies to bed, but she's been doing that for a few months now. We also added teeth brushing to her nighttime routine.
Teeth count: FOUR! With two more coming in. There was a little break in between tooth number one and tooth number two, but three and four (her two top front teeth) came in at the same time. She handled it well... there's a pretty large gap between the top ones, so we've dubbed them the "Michael Strahan teeth."
I think she finally likes me, which is a huge development. She's been much more smiley with me over the last few days and tries to climb on me too. Maybe I just don't smell bad anymore...
Add these to the list of things I've learned the hard way:
Swim diapers are not made to work like real diapers.
Don't give your child fruit for dinner.
Things Emma loves:
Her "chubby bunny" stuffed bunny that her Grammy gave her. It's her favorite stuffed animal.
Sweet potatoes.
Fruit.
Tap dancing in the bath tub.
Baby Einstein videos.
Pulling herself up in the pack n play, then slamming her little butt down on the mattress. The harder she falls, the bigger she smiles.
Drinking the water from the shower head when I rinse her off in the bath.
Being splashed in the face with water, then licking the water off her lips.
Chasing plastic balls around the living room.
Trying to crawl fast enough to reach the dog's food and water bowls before mommy or daddy can catch her.
Slapping mommy/daddy in the face when we try to give her kisses.
Biting mommy.
Things Emma hates:
Everything else.
As expected, I've been feeling a little emotional as we approach Emma's first birthday. On one hand, I'm so beyond thrilled that we've made it this far and that she's such a healthy, albeit stubborn, little girl. On the other hand, I still feel incredibly sad when I see the little scars all over her arms and legs from being in the NICU. We've all come so far in just one year... but we're all alive, happy, and healthy. That's all that matters in the end, no matter how we got here.
