*sigh* Emma has been battling her first cold of her little life all week... or at least I think that's what's going on. At the most, she's had a stuffy nose. Really, that's the worst it's been... so I'm very fortunate in that respect. She's had an occasional cough and some sneezing, but the sneezing is very typical for her. I used to laugh at her all the time in the NICU because it seemed like she was always sneezing during hands-on time. And a sneeze from a less-than-five-pound baby is seriously adorable. But she's done a fine job of fighting off whatever ailment this is- she has kept her goofy, happy demeanor for the most part. The only thing I've really noticed is that she's had great difficulty sleeping in some fashion; she's either taken two hours to go to bed or to hours to go back to bed. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night of last weekend were awful. She would get up for a bottle around 1 or 2am and wouldn't go back to bed for two hours. She'd sleep in my arms, but not in her crib. Monday night was alright, of course, because it was hubby's night to be up with her. So she slept all night. Go figure. Tuesday night was awful. And then something magical happened... she started sleeping through the night. All the way through the night.
I don't know what to do with myself. I almost feel more tired now that I'm well rested than I did when I was entirely sleep-deprived and my body seems to be getting greedy for sleep. To the point that I took a pregnancy test, as I haven't felt this kind of fatigue since my first trimester. No worries- there is not another crazy baby being formed in this belly. Whew.
She does seem to be on the mend now, though. Still stuffy, but at least she went to bed without a fight last night. It was amazing- she drifted off to sleep in my arms (which hasn't happened almost all week. She adamantly refused to fall asleep in my arms in the rocker and had to be held upright in my arms with my swaying back and forth) around 7:45pm and slept in her crib until 6:15am, had a bottle, then went back to sleep until 9am. She took an hour nap this morning, and now she's on the tail end of a three-hour nap in her crib this afternoon. I'm not going to get used to this, though. She has a tendency to switch up her routine without notice and screw up my sleep in the process. She's a pretty darned good reason to miss out on sleep, though. Even at 6:15am on a Saturday morning, I wanted to squeeze her to pieces because I love her so much and she's so cute and sweet.
I learned this week that having an infant and being on-call is no bueno. Thankfully my husband isn't working 24 hour shifts anymore... I don't know what I would have done in that case. The flip side is that I'm not on-call again until March, and I'm very OK with that prospect. :) It's also a good opportunity for either overtime pay or leaving super-early on a Friday.
As expected, I had some moments of reflection this week as it marked the one-year anniversary of some major events in my life. Like 12/18, when I felt the sharp twinges of her burrowing in and making herself comfortable. And 12/20, when I had my first-ever positive pregnancy test. Last night, I was reminiscing about the big announcement on Christmas day and the reaction from our parents... crazy baby was a much anticipated arrival to say the least. There's no way to top Christmas 2011, but this Christmas is going to be extra special as well.
I took Emma to the doctor on Monday to have her checked out to make sure she was breathing alright since she sounded a little wheezy to me that morning. She weighed 15 pounds 12oz with a slightly wet diaper and her clothes on. So I figure she's about 15 1/2 pounds. OMG. That puts her between the 50th and 75th percentile in weight for her actual age. She's above average. And I'm going to stop feeding her. Hah! Just kidding. She's short and fat, though. She definitely has my short legs and small feet. I still haven't figured out where the thunder thighs come from, other than the fact that she's a baby.
She still has not started rolling over yet, but tummy time is no longer her nemesis. I think she just realizes that she can hold her head up really high and can see things from a different perspective, so it keeps her interested for a little bit. She actually laughed a little while on her tummy this morning, which is a far cry from the fussing and whining of tummy-time in the recent past. She's making progress!
I held off on solid foods this week since she's been stuffy and not feeling well. I'll probably try again next week with some vegetables, and hopefully something that will help this constipation. We have a sweet new high chair (thanks, Nicole!!!!) for her, some special bowls, and her cute little spoons. I'll never deny that this child will be spoiled... but the goal is for her to be kind, sweet, and spoiled. I plan to teach her the value of giving, sharing, and being grateful. We'll see how that goes ;)
I can't think of any particularly funny moment from this week. I did get an awesome picture of her with a horrified/surprised look on her face. It's a keeper, for sure. She also peed in the bath a couple of times. I accidentally scratched her boobie with my fingernail and she laughed. And she's started laughing so hard that it surprises her. Yep, she's certifiably insane. She's definitely my kid.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Friday, December 14, 2012
All I Want for Christmas
One year ago today, miracle baby was nothing more than a tiny cluster of miracle cells growing, dividing, and making her way down my left (yes, left. I figured I ovulated out of my left side and the ultrasound tech confirmed it. Pretty cool, huh?) fallopian tube. It was truly the beginning of this insane journey. Being forever reflective and nostalgic, I've done lots of thinking about all of this over the last few days. So much has happened in just one year- many lessons learned, tears shed, hugs, smiles, and many days of having a severely sore jaw from clenching it from all of the anxiety. I'm going to do much more reflecting over the next few weeks because this is when the dominoes began to fall... starting with ovulating on 12/11, feeling twinges on 12/18, the positive pregnancy test on 12/20, then announcing the pregnancy to our families on 12/25. I have very vivid memories from those few weeks... "All I want for Christmas is You" played on the radio today and I swear I must have had the biggest smile on my face as I sang along in the car. It was my song to Emma last year when I found out she existed... "I just want you for my own, more than you could ever know... make my wish come true, baby all I want for Christmas is you." I know, it's a love song. But the lyrics are pretty fitting... just make "baby" into a more literal meaning and voila! Emma song. I always liked that song, but now it holds a special meaning and reminds me of the most amazing Christmas gift I've ever received- my sweet child.
And now for the good stuff. Miracle baby update!
This week was surprisingly great in the sleep department. Well, for Emma. Not so much for me. Last weekend was insanely hectic, starting on Saturday when I attended the baby shower of one of my bestest friends ever. I was so happy to see her glowing with her adorable (and TINY!) pregnant belly and the joy of a mom-to-be written all over her face. I've always loved when good things happen to great people... so this shower was definitely a celebration of that very situation. Hubby decided we should break RSV lockdown and take her to a wedding the next day so we could introduce her to some of our closest friends who have been dying to meet her... I reluctantly agreed, knowing that I'd be worried and stressed the whole time.
The wedding was beautiful and another amazing celebration of good things happening to great people. You could just feel the love. A few people used the word "miracle" in reference to Emma and it was surreal to hear other people say it. Because it really is true.
Miracle baby had two meltdowns- one when we got there, and one just before the reception. The first one resulted from attempting to feed her cold formula. She takes room-temperature formula like a champ, but try to give her cold formula and she'll look at you like you've just tried to feed her motor oil. Then apparently she starts screaming. I was flustered... was this how the whole night would be?! Initially, I wasn't sure what was bothering her so I tried everything, even stripping her out of her dress, thinking that she was uncomfortable in it. I let out a slight sigh of relief when she continued to scream sans dress, because I really wanted her to wear her dress for the wedding. Oh, 90210. I'll never change... Luckily she ended up calming down and I regained my composure in time for the ceremony to start. And wouldn't you know it, she was so great during the ceremony. She even farted... just loud enough for the few people around us to hear. I had to stifle my laughter. I got her into the car after the cocktail hour to take her to the reception nearby, but there was a long line for the valet and the cars weren't moving. And then the screaming started. In an act of desperation, I pulled out my phone, looked up the number for the restaurant, and asked if there was another place to park. Hooray technology! I parked and frantically made up a bottle and fed her into a stupor. Poor kid. She was so well-behaved during the reception too... I fed her before I brought her home so she would sleep in the car. Then I got her home, fed her a little more, then put her in bed. And proceeded to collapse myself so I could get a few hours of sleep before I had to be up to feed her, then sleep for another hour before having to be up in the morning to get her ready, take her to my mom, and go to work. *yawn*
In short, we survived. And I learned to never ever put her in the car if she hasn't eaten something recently unless I want to drive home with a seriously shouty baby.
So the rest of the week went smoothly... her ever-changing schedule stayed consistent this week and I'm going to be sad to see it go- I know it won't last long because she likes to change things up with no warning. She's been in bed somewhere between 7 and 8:30pm every night after having about 8-10 ounces of formula before going down for the night. Not always at once, but usually within about 2 hours of bedtime. Then she sleeps until 4:30 or 5, has a quick bottle, then is back in bed until I wake her up around 7:45 or 8. It allows me to get up at 7, shower, make my coffee, feed the dog, put on my makeup, let the dog out, and prepare the bottle and medicine for miracle baby. I've settled into a good but hectic morning routine, which is crazy for me since I'm the opposite of a morning person.
And, the biggest news of all- she is finally sleeping well at my in-laws house in her pack n play! YAY! She slept for three straight hours yesterday and three and a half today like a big girl :) I'm so relieved... it's definitely contributed to her better nighttime settling and overall happiness.
This kid is seriously a cheeseball. And I'm not referring to the cheese factory, also known as her neck, that I've reference in past posts. In fact, the cheese factory is mostly shut down now that she is starting to have a real neck and not just a head sitting on top of little shoulders. Apparently that's what happens when you can actually start to hold your head up. Anyways... if you had asked me three months ago how I would have described my child, I would have used words like pukey, gassy, sleepy, and colicky. Now, I'd say she's goofy, silly, happy, and sweet. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, miracle baby has a personality! She's every bit as funny and goofy as I thought she'd be, too. She cheeses at anyone who makes eye contact with her, and if she's being held when someone makes eye contact, she quickly smiles, turns her head away, kicks her feet, and smacks whoever is holding her. I like to say that she smiles with her whole body. And her eyes... those eyes. I can always tell how she's feeling based on those gigantic eyes. That's the first thing that everyone says when they see her, too- "oh my god, those eyes!" Yes, they're huge. Add in the chubby cheeks and her big open-mouthed toothless smile, and she's one stinkin' cute baby if I do say so myself.
She's also about this [] close to rolling over from her tummy to her back. She can do a baby pushup (more like upward facing dog, if you ask me) that would put an athlete to shame, and is now starting to rock to one side. In fact, she came so close to rolling over at my in-laws' house today that I really thought she was going to do it. Just one more inch to the side and she would have rolled herself right over, so it's only a matter of days before she finally does it. She can also sit up on her own for brief periods of time before she topples to one side or the other... I can't believe how quickly she's growing and learning! She can also react much quicker and can divert her attention to something new immediately without the delay she had before. She's moved up from the Pentium II to the Intel I5 ;) Her playmat is still one of her favorite things to do, but now she prefers to kick her toys while grasping as many of them with her hands as she can. She likes a challenge, I guess.
I just love her to pieces. I can't kiss her and cuddle her enough... I'm never satisfied with the amount of kisses I can give her in one day.
Hopefully soon I'll figure out a way to post pictures again. Until then, trust me when I say she's super-cute. Because she is.
And now for the good stuff. Miracle baby update!
This week was surprisingly great in the sleep department. Well, for Emma. Not so much for me. Last weekend was insanely hectic, starting on Saturday when I attended the baby shower of one of my bestest friends ever. I was so happy to see her glowing with her adorable (and TINY!) pregnant belly and the joy of a mom-to-be written all over her face. I've always loved when good things happen to great people... so this shower was definitely a celebration of that very situation. Hubby decided we should break RSV lockdown and take her to a wedding the next day so we could introduce her to some of our closest friends who have been dying to meet her... I reluctantly agreed, knowing that I'd be worried and stressed the whole time.
The wedding was beautiful and another amazing celebration of good things happening to great people. You could just feel the love. A few people used the word "miracle" in reference to Emma and it was surreal to hear other people say it. Because it really is true.
Miracle baby had two meltdowns- one when we got there, and one just before the reception. The first one resulted from attempting to feed her cold formula. She takes room-temperature formula like a champ, but try to give her cold formula and she'll look at you like you've just tried to feed her motor oil. Then apparently she starts screaming. I was flustered... was this how the whole night would be?! Initially, I wasn't sure what was bothering her so I tried everything, even stripping her out of her dress, thinking that she was uncomfortable in it. I let out a slight sigh of relief when she continued to scream sans dress, because I really wanted her to wear her dress for the wedding. Oh, 90210. I'll never change... Luckily she ended up calming down and I regained my composure in time for the ceremony to start. And wouldn't you know it, she was so great during the ceremony. She even farted... just loud enough for the few people around us to hear. I had to stifle my laughter. I got her into the car after the cocktail hour to take her to the reception nearby, but there was a long line for the valet and the cars weren't moving. And then the screaming started. In an act of desperation, I pulled out my phone, looked up the number for the restaurant, and asked if there was another place to park. Hooray technology! I parked and frantically made up a bottle and fed her into a stupor. Poor kid. She was so well-behaved during the reception too... I fed her before I brought her home so she would sleep in the car. Then I got her home, fed her a little more, then put her in bed. And proceeded to collapse myself so I could get a few hours of sleep before I had to be up to feed her, then sleep for another hour before having to be up in the morning to get her ready, take her to my mom, and go to work. *yawn*
In short, we survived. And I learned to never ever put her in the car if she hasn't eaten something recently unless I want to drive home with a seriously shouty baby.
So the rest of the week went smoothly... her ever-changing schedule stayed consistent this week and I'm going to be sad to see it go- I know it won't last long because she likes to change things up with no warning. She's been in bed somewhere between 7 and 8:30pm every night after having about 8-10 ounces of formula before going down for the night. Not always at once, but usually within about 2 hours of bedtime. Then she sleeps until 4:30 or 5, has a quick bottle, then is back in bed until I wake her up around 7:45 or 8. It allows me to get up at 7, shower, make my coffee, feed the dog, put on my makeup, let the dog out, and prepare the bottle and medicine for miracle baby. I've settled into a good but hectic morning routine, which is crazy for me since I'm the opposite of a morning person.
And, the biggest news of all- she is finally sleeping well at my in-laws house in her pack n play! YAY! She slept for three straight hours yesterday and three and a half today like a big girl :) I'm so relieved... it's definitely contributed to her better nighttime settling and overall happiness.
This kid is seriously a cheeseball. And I'm not referring to the cheese factory, also known as her neck, that I've reference in past posts. In fact, the cheese factory is mostly shut down now that she is starting to have a real neck and not just a head sitting on top of little shoulders. Apparently that's what happens when you can actually start to hold your head up. Anyways... if you had asked me three months ago how I would have described my child, I would have used words like pukey, gassy, sleepy, and colicky. Now, I'd say she's goofy, silly, happy, and sweet. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, miracle baby has a personality! She's every bit as funny and goofy as I thought she'd be, too. She cheeses at anyone who makes eye contact with her, and if she's being held when someone makes eye contact, she quickly smiles, turns her head away, kicks her feet, and smacks whoever is holding her. I like to say that she smiles with her whole body. And her eyes... those eyes. I can always tell how she's feeling based on those gigantic eyes. That's the first thing that everyone says when they see her, too- "oh my god, those eyes!" Yes, they're huge. Add in the chubby cheeks and her big open-mouthed toothless smile, and she's one stinkin' cute baby if I do say so myself.
She's also about this [] close to rolling over from her tummy to her back. She can do a baby pushup (more like upward facing dog, if you ask me) that would put an athlete to shame, and is now starting to rock to one side. In fact, she came so close to rolling over at my in-laws' house today that I really thought she was going to do it. Just one more inch to the side and she would have rolled herself right over, so it's only a matter of days before she finally does it. She can also sit up on her own for brief periods of time before she topples to one side or the other... I can't believe how quickly she's growing and learning! She can also react much quicker and can divert her attention to something new immediately without the delay she had before. She's moved up from the Pentium II to the Intel I5 ;) Her playmat is still one of her favorite things to do, but now she prefers to kick her toys while grasping as many of them with her hands as she can. She likes a challenge, I guess.
I just love her to pieces. I can't kiss her and cuddle her enough... I'm never satisfied with the amount of kisses I can give her in one day.
Hopefully soon I'll figure out a way to post pictures again. Until then, trust me when I say she's super-cute. Because she is.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Sleep is Good for Everyone
My blogging hiatus was completely unintentional... blame it on the books I've been reading. And crazy baby... she's also a big reason why I haven't been blogging.
The funny thing is, I feel more tired now than I did when I was getting up every 2-3 hours at night to feed her and pump. It's either a) getting up in the middle of the night for five (well, six if you include my hospital stay) months straight is catching up to me b) I just don't remember how tired I really was in those early months or c) both. I'm going to go with c on this one.
So, here I am. Sitting on the couch typing away while crazy baby is peacefully sleeping in her crib. Well, as peacefully as she can sleep. Whoever coined the phrase "sleeping like a baby" clearly had no clue how a baby really sleeps. Or they meant the phrase to mean "grunting, wiggling, squirming, burping, farting, and puking at least hourly all night long." In which case, the saying would ring true. Anyways...
The big adjustment now is her ever-changing schedule. It seems like every week is different as her body is growing and her brain is learning, which translates into changes in her feeding and sleeping schedule. For about a week, she was sleeping straight through the night. Then she started waking up once per night for about a week or two. Then a solid two to three weeks of waking up twice in the night. Now we're back to once, but last night was twice again. It's really not that bad though... it only takes me a total of 30 minutes to prepare her bottle, change her diaper, feed her, burp her, cuddle her, then place her back into her crib. The part of her schedule that has been consistent is her waking time and nap schedule, at least for the most part. She wakes up anywhere between 7:30 and 8:00am most days. Then she eats, plays, and usually gets put into her car seat, much to her dismay, and shipped off to Grandma and Grandpa's house or to Grammy and Pop's for the day. Last weekend, her schedule was perfect. One hour nap in the morning, catnap at lunch time, then a three hour nap from 3pm to 6pm. And lately, she's been in bed asleep around 8pm. Tonight was a little different, as she was just slightly overtired and didn't want to be rocked to sleep. So I put her in her crib and sat nearby while she grunted and wiggled herself to sleep, all the while attempting to suck her thumb. In the process, she gagged herself about a hundred times. One day she'll gain control over those crazy fingers. At least I hope. But anyways, she ended up falling asleep around 8:30ish and has been having little baby dreams ever since. Cute, sweet little baby dreams.
So it's been nice to see a pattern emerging with her. And even nicer to know how well-adjusted she is overall. As long as she gets enough naps during the day and enough sleep at night, she's the happiest, sweetest little girl in the world. And even when she's tired, she'll still smile and get all cheesy with you... until she realizes she's overtired. Then the wailing starts. See below. But it's actually quite an interesting adventure trying to figure all of this out and I get quite a sense of accomplishment when I try something and it works well. For a while, Emma did great with her bath/bottle/swaddle routine. Then suddenly, it stopped working as she started spending more time at her grandparents' houses and less time at home and her schedule changed. Trying to get her into a bath when she got home after barely sleeping during the day made for an incredibly angry, screaming, crying baby. See below. So I adapted and overcame. The bath is flexible- she doesn't always get one. If I'm home early enough and she's gotten a decent amount of sleep, then I'll now give her a bottle first, then a bath, then some quiet activities (like reading a book or some calm play time), then when she gets tired, it's lights out and I offer her a bottle again and let her drift to sleep in my arms. It has worked out quite well lately. But if she's tired, then the lights go out, she gets a bottle, and typically just goes to bed early.
I will overcome the overtired baby syndrome. That's my current struggle. If she doesn't get her naps during the day when she's being babysat, then she goes into nuclear meltdown mode when she gets home. We're talking full-on relentless screaming. It makes her colic days look like a walk in the park. She did this for 45 minutes straight one night and I about lost my mind... there was absolutely nothing I could do to make her feel better. Nothing. I just held her while she screamed until she tired herself out and went limp in my arms, at which point I was far too terrified to put her in her crib, so I held her for a little while to make sure she was good and asleep before I put her down. And held my breath while I made sure she really was asleep and wasn't going to start screaming again... then proceeded to curl up in hubby's lap and cry. It was so exhausting to have her scream like that and not be able to help her feel better. I felt like I had been run over by a bus. A bus of screaming infants, that is. And the other night, she started getting hungry on our way home from my parents' house and was overtired then too. She had just fallen into a deep sleep when I got there to pick her up and she was awakened by being put in her car seat. So hungry+interrupted sleep= screaming for 35 minutes straight in the car. By the time I made it home, my nerves were fried. I called hubby on the way and apologized in advance for biting his head off. I knew it would happen- I was beyond frustrated and wanted nothing more than to get home and make her feel better. It was an even more helpless feeling than before- at least the time prior, I was able to hold her.This time, she was in that darned car seat and out of my reach. Luckily she ate well and fell asleep.
So that has got to stop. I'm open to any and all suggestions on why she won't nap well while she's not at home. She sleeps well in my parents' pack n play at their house, if only she would stop pooping during her afternoon nap there and waking herself up with her poopy pants. She naps like a champ at home- she'll easily sleep for three hours in her crib in the afternoon here. In fact, she hasn't had a real nap in her swing in quite some time now. Woohoo!
She's developing and learning at such a rapid pace now. She's just about ready to start sitting up on her own and it's obvious that she's starting to use her core muscles now. She is also almost ready to roll from her tummy to her back... she has inadvertently rolled the other direction multiple times before. But she's now trying to intentionally roll because she still. hates. tummy time. Poor kid. She has also mastered the one-handed and two-handed grasps. She can easily grab something, pull it to her mouth, and lick/bite whatever she's holding. Including lots of mommy hair. Hah! She still loves her playmat and goes to town on the toys, going back and forth between slamming them and grabbing onto them and pulling them. Her hands are very, very grabby these days. Nothing is safe. Not even my mom's dog's ears.
Crazy baby has also turned into quite the conversationalist too... well, more like quite the giggler. She sometimes babbles and coos, but mostly giggles and laughs. She is a true goofball, just like I thought she would be. Her little eyes light up when she laughs and it melts my heart. It's also quite distracting and it's difficult to get out the door on time in the morning when you've got this amazing little creature giggling at you and flashing some sparkly little cupie-doll eyes at you. Ugh, I love her too much. She also gets quite bashful now too... if she's being held by someone and sees someone else, she'll smile, then bury her face into the person holding her, then look back at the second person. Bath time continues to be the highlight of her day- she has her pre-bath giggling fit, then she splashes, giggles, and plays with her toys until the water starts to get cold. Some nights, she'd stay in that bathtub for hours if I'd let her. My little water baby...
Emma's first Christmas is rapidly approaching. It's going to be a very sentimental Christmas this year. December 18th is also right around the corner, and hopefully I can blog that day and reflect on everything that it means to me. It's crazy to think that this time last year was the last few weeks of my life that I wasn't a mommy... my, how quickly things change. And my, what a crazy roller coaster of a ride it has been.
Welp. I tried posting pictures, but it's a no-go. Apparently I've used up all of my storage for photos on this blog, so I either have to purchase more storage, or get my tech-wizard husband to help out. But seeing how it's past my bedtime, I think I'm going to opt to try again some other time.
Time for my nightly routine- peek and smile at the baby in her crib, quietly sneak away, then get ready for bed. I love seeing how peaceful she looks while she's sleeping :)
The funny thing is, I feel more tired now than I did when I was getting up every 2-3 hours at night to feed her and pump. It's either a) getting up in the middle of the night for five (well, six if you include my hospital stay) months straight is catching up to me b) I just don't remember how tired I really was in those early months or c) both. I'm going to go with c on this one.
So, here I am. Sitting on the couch typing away while crazy baby is peacefully sleeping in her crib. Well, as peacefully as she can sleep. Whoever coined the phrase "sleeping like a baby" clearly had no clue how a baby really sleeps. Or they meant the phrase to mean "grunting, wiggling, squirming, burping, farting, and puking at least hourly all night long." In which case, the saying would ring true. Anyways...
The big adjustment now is her ever-changing schedule. It seems like every week is different as her body is growing and her brain is learning, which translates into changes in her feeding and sleeping schedule. For about a week, she was sleeping straight through the night. Then she started waking up once per night for about a week or two. Then a solid two to three weeks of waking up twice in the night. Now we're back to once, but last night was twice again. It's really not that bad though... it only takes me a total of 30 minutes to prepare her bottle, change her diaper, feed her, burp her, cuddle her, then place her back into her crib. The part of her schedule that has been consistent is her waking time and nap schedule, at least for the most part. She wakes up anywhere between 7:30 and 8:00am most days. Then she eats, plays, and usually gets put into her car seat, much to her dismay, and shipped off to Grandma and Grandpa's house or to Grammy and Pop's for the day. Last weekend, her schedule was perfect. One hour nap in the morning, catnap at lunch time, then a three hour nap from 3pm to 6pm. And lately, she's been in bed asleep around 8pm. Tonight was a little different, as she was just slightly overtired and didn't want to be rocked to sleep. So I put her in her crib and sat nearby while she grunted and wiggled herself to sleep, all the while attempting to suck her thumb. In the process, she gagged herself about a hundred times. One day she'll gain control over those crazy fingers. At least I hope. But anyways, she ended up falling asleep around 8:30ish and has been having little baby dreams ever since. Cute, sweet little baby dreams.
So it's been nice to see a pattern emerging with her. And even nicer to know how well-adjusted she is overall. As long as she gets enough naps during the day and enough sleep at night, she's the happiest, sweetest little girl in the world. And even when she's tired, she'll still smile and get all cheesy with you... until she realizes she's overtired. Then the wailing starts. See below. But it's actually quite an interesting adventure trying to figure all of this out and I get quite a sense of accomplishment when I try something and it works well. For a while, Emma did great with her bath/bottle/swaddle routine. Then suddenly, it stopped working as she started spending more time at her grandparents' houses and less time at home and her schedule changed. Trying to get her into a bath when she got home after barely sleeping during the day made for an incredibly angry, screaming, crying baby. See below. So I adapted and overcame. The bath is flexible- she doesn't always get one. If I'm home early enough and she's gotten a decent amount of sleep, then I'll now give her a bottle first, then a bath, then some quiet activities (like reading a book or some calm play time), then when she gets tired, it's lights out and I offer her a bottle again and let her drift to sleep in my arms. It has worked out quite well lately. But if she's tired, then the lights go out, she gets a bottle, and typically just goes to bed early.
I will overcome the overtired baby syndrome. That's my current struggle. If she doesn't get her naps during the day when she's being babysat, then she goes into nuclear meltdown mode when she gets home. We're talking full-on relentless screaming. It makes her colic days look like a walk in the park. She did this for 45 minutes straight one night and I about lost my mind... there was absolutely nothing I could do to make her feel better. Nothing. I just held her while she screamed until she tired herself out and went limp in my arms, at which point I was far too terrified to put her in her crib, so I held her for a little while to make sure she was good and asleep before I put her down. And held my breath while I made sure she really was asleep and wasn't going to start screaming again... then proceeded to curl up in hubby's lap and cry. It was so exhausting to have her scream like that and not be able to help her feel better. I felt like I had been run over by a bus. A bus of screaming infants, that is. And the other night, she started getting hungry on our way home from my parents' house and was overtired then too. She had just fallen into a deep sleep when I got there to pick her up and she was awakened by being put in her car seat. So hungry+interrupted sleep= screaming for 35 minutes straight in the car. By the time I made it home, my nerves were fried. I called hubby on the way and apologized in advance for biting his head off. I knew it would happen- I was beyond frustrated and wanted nothing more than to get home and make her feel better. It was an even more helpless feeling than before- at least the time prior, I was able to hold her.This time, she was in that darned car seat and out of my reach. Luckily she ate well and fell asleep.
So that has got to stop. I'm open to any and all suggestions on why she won't nap well while she's not at home. She sleeps well in my parents' pack n play at their house, if only she would stop pooping during her afternoon nap there and waking herself up with her poopy pants. She naps like a champ at home- she'll easily sleep for three hours in her crib in the afternoon here. In fact, she hasn't had a real nap in her swing in quite some time now. Woohoo!
She's developing and learning at such a rapid pace now. She's just about ready to start sitting up on her own and it's obvious that she's starting to use her core muscles now. She is also almost ready to roll from her tummy to her back... she has inadvertently rolled the other direction multiple times before. But she's now trying to intentionally roll because she still. hates. tummy time. Poor kid. She has also mastered the one-handed and two-handed grasps. She can easily grab something, pull it to her mouth, and lick/bite whatever she's holding. Including lots of mommy hair. Hah! She still loves her playmat and goes to town on the toys, going back and forth between slamming them and grabbing onto them and pulling them. Her hands are very, very grabby these days. Nothing is safe. Not even my mom's dog's ears.
Crazy baby has also turned into quite the conversationalist too... well, more like quite the giggler. She sometimes babbles and coos, but mostly giggles and laughs. She is a true goofball, just like I thought she would be. Her little eyes light up when she laughs and it melts my heart. It's also quite distracting and it's difficult to get out the door on time in the morning when you've got this amazing little creature giggling at you and flashing some sparkly little cupie-doll eyes at you. Ugh, I love her too much. She also gets quite bashful now too... if she's being held by someone and sees someone else, she'll smile, then bury her face into the person holding her, then look back at the second person. Bath time continues to be the highlight of her day- she has her pre-bath giggling fit, then she splashes, giggles, and plays with her toys until the water starts to get cold. Some nights, she'd stay in that bathtub for hours if I'd let her. My little water baby...
Emma's first Christmas is rapidly approaching. It's going to be a very sentimental Christmas this year. December 18th is also right around the corner, and hopefully I can blog that day and reflect on everything that it means to me. It's crazy to think that this time last year was the last few weeks of my life that I wasn't a mommy... my, how quickly things change. And my, what a crazy roller coaster of a ride it has been.
Welp. I tried posting pictures, but it's a no-go. Apparently I've used up all of my storage for photos on this blog, so I either have to purchase more storage, or get my tech-wizard husband to help out. But seeing how it's past my bedtime, I think I'm going to opt to try again some other time.
Time for my nightly routine- peek and smile at the baby in her crib, quietly sneak away, then get ready for bed. I love seeing how peaceful she looks while she's sleeping :)
Sunday, November 25, 2012
Hands are for Grabbing
OMG FRANTIC BLOG POST BECAUSE THERE'S A LOT TO WRITE ABOUT AND I REALLY NEED TO GO TO BED! BAH!
But seriously. A lot has happened over the last week and I really want to put it all in writing while it's still fresh in my memory. It's not that I haven't had time to blog, because I've actually had plenty, but I've been pretty wrapped up in a book that I can't put down so I've found that my four-day weekend (Thanksgiving, woohoo!) drifted by very quickly. Now it's almost 10pm on Sunday. Boooooo.
I spent a lot of time with my little sweet pea during the long weekend because hubby was away on a dude's weekend (read: bachelor party) for two days, leaving me to monopolize every second of baby girl's awake time. It was tiring, but super fun.
Over the last week, Emma has really refined her grabbing skills to the point where she's almost a pro at it. Almost. It all started with her having more control over her arms, leading to her being able to move them slower and allow her the opportunity to catch her toys. But this was mostly done without her looking. I guess she was just that good- she didn't even need to look at what she was doing! Now, she can look at a toy, decide she wants to grab it, shakily move her arm towards it, grab on, and pull. Coincidentally, it's not so great for mommy's long hair. I keep forgetting to put it up for middle-of-the-night feeds. Anyways, if a toy easy enough for her to grab- say, a link- then she can hold on for quite a while. She has a small, soft rattle that she likes to grab, but she doesn't possess the grip strength to keep hold of it while she flails it around, resulting in the rattle being accidentally thrown directly at her face more than once. She doesn't care, though. She just keeps on flailing. Anyways, her playmat has, once again, taken on new form for her. Initially, when she was a teeny-tiny newborn/preemie, she would lie on it and stare at the bars that hold the toys. One bar is black with white polka dots, the other is bright-colored stripes; they're perfect for early visual stimulation and development. Eventually, she began looking at the toys hanging above her. Then she realized that she could hit them. Then she started grabbing. Now she's intentionally grabbing them. It's really stinking cute, too- she grabs a toy on her right side (usually the chain of links I made), and one on her left side (currently, it's her plastic zebra rattle), and pulls them both down. Then, she starts moving them around in little circles and random patterns because she still can't keep her arms still... not that she wants to. But it seriously looks like she's steering some unseen spaceship with hanging joysticks or conducting an imaginary orchestra with her toys. This kid cracks me up.
That's one of the biggest changes with her... she now has intent. She wants to do something, and then tries to do it. You can just see the gears turning in her head as she thinks about what is going on around her. If I lay her on the floor and walk around the room, her eyes and head follow me around with ease. She loves watching what I do. It doesn't take much to entertain her- thank God. But as the days are going on, it's becoming more clear that she's really absorbing everything around her and she wants to interact with her environment and be a part of the world around her. Gone is the tiny, skinny baby who stared off into the distance and smiled at the ceiling.
Speaking of smiles. She's been flashing her toothless grin around all day every day. Every time she sees me, she smiles instantly (she's going to give me a big head about how important I am. *wink*), and she also smiles at other people, it just takes a few seconds longer for her to process new faces. So all weekend, I've been greeted with smiles every time I approach her.
Thursday, 11/22, was her first Thanksgiving! Not that it meant much to her. She really had no clue what was going on. But for me, it meant a whole room full of people who were more than happy to hold the baby while I indulged in a glass (ok, two) of wine. After we got back home, it was time for bath and bed. Her Boppy Newborn Lounger has had an official title change- it is now her pre-and post bath pillow. I drape her towel over it, place her on it, and take her out of her diaper before her bath. After her bath, I put her on the pillow again and wrap her towel around her. It works great. So before her bath on Thanksgiving, I put her on her pillow and told her that it seemed she'd have a fun bath because she was in a good mood. She looked up at me and smiled, so I smiled back and giggled. And then it began... she had her first real, true laugh. Up until then, she's basically had a vocalized smile- she'd smile and make this goofy little noise at the same time. But this was different- it was a full-on, open-mouthed laugh. And it quickly escalated into a giggling fit. Tears welled up in my eyes from laughing so hard right along with her. Hubby managed to get a quick video of her lying on her pillow in the bathroom in just an unfastened diaper (she's going to kill us for this when she's older), giggling hysterically. I put her in her bath, and held up her rubber ducky while saying "quack quack" and bobbing the ducky up and down. That made her laugh even harder. She's only had two more laughing fits like that since then, but I have treasured every second of them :)
I tried spoon-feeding her this week too. I know, I know. It's a little early. I felt like she was ready, though- she takes her medicine out of her dropper with no issues. I just put it in the front of her mouth, drip some on the front of her tongue, and she swallows it with ease. She was also on cereal in her bottle for her reflux since she was -5weeks old (she came home at 35 weeks and was already on cereal at that point) until she was about 2 1/2 months old. So I gave her some soupy rice cereal on a spoon and she wasn't thrilled. But she was also famished. I tried again with apples mixed with some breastmilk the next morning, and she was more interested and intrigued, but still too hungry to care too much. Today, hubby gave her some more cereal and she loved it. She smiled and sputtered a bit with cereal all over her face. Too cute.
But I don't know if we should continue or wait another month. On the one hand, she seems to like it and does well with it. On the other hand, the AAP and WHO suggest waiting until 6 months. But then there's all of the literature that says that waiting too much longer than that puts the baby at risk of a food aversion. She's already had a feeding tube, which can cause an aversion down the road. I had a little girl on my caseload at work that had a food aversion... it's not something I'd like to contend with. So- you're supposed to start at 6 months, no sooner, no later? But then the general recommendation from pediatricians and a lot of reputable parenting websites suggest 4-6 months, depending if your child appears ready. Mine is 4 1/2 months old and seems ready. But is it too early? Bah! Parenting is a lot of trial and error, so I've learned.
I have definitely sunken into my groove with being a mommy. No longer am I horrified of finding her blue in her carseat after a fifteen minute drive to my in-laws' house. And no longer am I wondering what to do with her to keep her entertained while she's awake. I felt confident and calm these past two days of being a pretend single mother... it's a far cry from wanting to curl into a ball in a corner every time she needed to eat out of fear that she'd have a brady and I wouldn't be able to revive her. That's why I'm glad I made this blog. I see how far I've come. I vividly remember the days of colic and the completely sleepless nights. Of waking up to the sound of her alarm going off while hubby fed her in the middle of the night and feeling paralyzed until it stopped beeping. And here I am now, giggling and playing with my sweet little girl and standing next to her crib while she drifts off to sleep while staring at me.
It reminds me of a training I attended on Reactive Attachment Disorder, in which the trainer referred to the mother as being the "supreme goddess" of the baby's universe. The basis of that saying is that, in the early months of a baby's life, the baby needs to know that mommy will drop everything at any time of the day or night to fulfill the baby's needs. Diaper, food, cuddling... anything. It builds a trusting relationship and a happy baby. It stems from the "attachment parenting" philosophy. I don't subscribe to everything in that philosophy. Namely co-sleeping. I think I fall somewhere between attachment parenting and parent-directed feeding schedules. I take her cues and let her tell me when she's hungry or needs something, but I also ensure that she sleeps in her crib at night and is able to soothe herself to sleep at times. I try to keep a good balance but I make sure that it's always about what is best for her. Not me. Yes, I still get up twice per night to feed her and it can get exhausting. But I just go to bed earlier in the evening (except tonight! aaaahhhhh I need to go to bed!!!) so I can get some sort of sleep. These days will pass eventually and I will get a full night of uninterrupted sleep again at some point. Maybe in another 18 years, but it will happen. Hah! But seriously... I'm happy, baby's happy, hubby's happy. My puppy may be happy too... poor thing. She used to be the center of the universe, and now she's not. I try to make it up to her by sacrificing my foot room in bed so she can have her very own pillow to lay on. She likes it, and I like to think that it somehow makes up for the decrease in attention she gets.
Alright. Now I'm rambling. Time to face-plant into bed.
But seriously. A lot has happened over the last week and I really want to put it all in writing while it's still fresh in my memory. It's not that I haven't had time to blog, because I've actually had plenty, but I've been pretty wrapped up in a book that I can't put down so I've found that my four-day weekend (Thanksgiving, woohoo!) drifted by very quickly. Now it's almost 10pm on Sunday. Boooooo.
I spent a lot of time with my little sweet pea during the long weekend because hubby was away on a dude's weekend (read: bachelor party) for two days, leaving me to monopolize every second of baby girl's awake time. It was tiring, but super fun.
Over the last week, Emma has really refined her grabbing skills to the point where she's almost a pro at it. Almost. It all started with her having more control over her arms, leading to her being able to move them slower and allow her the opportunity to catch her toys. But this was mostly done without her looking. I guess she was just that good- she didn't even need to look at what she was doing! Now, she can look at a toy, decide she wants to grab it, shakily move her arm towards it, grab on, and pull. Coincidentally, it's not so great for mommy's long hair. I keep forgetting to put it up for middle-of-the-night feeds. Anyways, if a toy easy enough for her to grab- say, a link- then she can hold on for quite a while. She has a small, soft rattle that she likes to grab, but she doesn't possess the grip strength to keep hold of it while she flails it around, resulting in the rattle being accidentally thrown directly at her face more than once. She doesn't care, though. She just keeps on flailing. Anyways, her playmat has, once again, taken on new form for her. Initially, when she was a teeny-tiny newborn/preemie, she would lie on it and stare at the bars that hold the toys. One bar is black with white polka dots, the other is bright-colored stripes; they're perfect for early visual stimulation and development. Eventually, she began looking at the toys hanging above her. Then she realized that she could hit them. Then she started grabbing. Now she's intentionally grabbing them. It's really stinking cute, too- she grabs a toy on her right side (usually the chain of links I made), and one on her left side (currently, it's her plastic zebra rattle), and pulls them both down. Then, she starts moving them around in little circles and random patterns because she still can't keep her arms still... not that she wants to. But it seriously looks like she's steering some unseen spaceship with hanging joysticks or conducting an imaginary orchestra with her toys. This kid cracks me up.
That's one of the biggest changes with her... she now has intent. She wants to do something, and then tries to do it. You can just see the gears turning in her head as she thinks about what is going on around her. If I lay her on the floor and walk around the room, her eyes and head follow me around with ease. She loves watching what I do. It doesn't take much to entertain her- thank God. But as the days are going on, it's becoming more clear that she's really absorbing everything around her and she wants to interact with her environment and be a part of the world around her. Gone is the tiny, skinny baby who stared off into the distance and smiled at the ceiling.
Speaking of smiles. She's been flashing her toothless grin around all day every day. Every time she sees me, she smiles instantly (she's going to give me a big head about how important I am. *wink*), and she also smiles at other people, it just takes a few seconds longer for her to process new faces. So all weekend, I've been greeted with smiles every time I approach her.
Thursday, 11/22, was her first Thanksgiving! Not that it meant much to her. She really had no clue what was going on. But for me, it meant a whole room full of people who were more than happy to hold the baby while I indulged in a glass (ok, two) of wine. After we got back home, it was time for bath and bed. Her Boppy Newborn Lounger has had an official title change- it is now her pre-and post bath pillow. I drape her towel over it, place her on it, and take her out of her diaper before her bath. After her bath, I put her on the pillow again and wrap her towel around her. It works great. So before her bath on Thanksgiving, I put her on her pillow and told her that it seemed she'd have a fun bath because she was in a good mood. She looked up at me and smiled, so I smiled back and giggled. And then it began... she had her first real, true laugh. Up until then, she's basically had a vocalized smile- she'd smile and make this goofy little noise at the same time. But this was different- it was a full-on, open-mouthed laugh. And it quickly escalated into a giggling fit. Tears welled up in my eyes from laughing so hard right along with her. Hubby managed to get a quick video of her lying on her pillow in the bathroom in just an unfastened diaper (she's going to kill us for this when she's older), giggling hysterically. I put her in her bath, and held up her rubber ducky while saying "quack quack" and bobbing the ducky up and down. That made her laugh even harder. She's only had two more laughing fits like that since then, but I have treasured every second of them :)
I tried spoon-feeding her this week too. I know, I know. It's a little early. I felt like she was ready, though- she takes her medicine out of her dropper with no issues. I just put it in the front of her mouth, drip some on the front of her tongue, and she swallows it with ease. She was also on cereal in her bottle for her reflux since she was -5weeks old (she came home at 35 weeks and was already on cereal at that point) until she was about 2 1/2 months old. So I gave her some soupy rice cereal on a spoon and she wasn't thrilled. But she was also famished. I tried again with apples mixed with some breastmilk the next morning, and she was more interested and intrigued, but still too hungry to care too much. Today, hubby gave her some more cereal and she loved it. She smiled and sputtered a bit with cereal all over her face. Too cute.
But I don't know if we should continue or wait another month. On the one hand, she seems to like it and does well with it. On the other hand, the AAP and WHO suggest waiting until 6 months. But then there's all of the literature that says that waiting too much longer than that puts the baby at risk of a food aversion. She's already had a feeding tube, which can cause an aversion down the road. I had a little girl on my caseload at work that had a food aversion... it's not something I'd like to contend with. So- you're supposed to start at 6 months, no sooner, no later? But then the general recommendation from pediatricians and a lot of reputable parenting websites suggest 4-6 months, depending if your child appears ready. Mine is 4 1/2 months old and seems ready. But is it too early? Bah! Parenting is a lot of trial and error, so I've learned.
I have definitely sunken into my groove with being a mommy. No longer am I horrified of finding her blue in her carseat after a fifteen minute drive to my in-laws' house. And no longer am I wondering what to do with her to keep her entertained while she's awake. I felt confident and calm these past two days of being a pretend single mother... it's a far cry from wanting to curl into a ball in a corner every time she needed to eat out of fear that she'd have a brady and I wouldn't be able to revive her. That's why I'm glad I made this blog. I see how far I've come. I vividly remember the days of colic and the completely sleepless nights. Of waking up to the sound of her alarm going off while hubby fed her in the middle of the night and feeling paralyzed until it stopped beeping. And here I am now, giggling and playing with my sweet little girl and standing next to her crib while she drifts off to sleep while staring at me.
It reminds me of a training I attended on Reactive Attachment Disorder, in which the trainer referred to the mother as being the "supreme goddess" of the baby's universe. The basis of that saying is that, in the early months of a baby's life, the baby needs to know that mommy will drop everything at any time of the day or night to fulfill the baby's needs. Diaper, food, cuddling... anything. It builds a trusting relationship and a happy baby. It stems from the "attachment parenting" philosophy. I don't subscribe to everything in that philosophy. Namely co-sleeping. I think I fall somewhere between attachment parenting and parent-directed feeding schedules. I take her cues and let her tell me when she's hungry or needs something, but I also ensure that she sleeps in her crib at night and is able to soothe herself to sleep at times. I try to keep a good balance but I make sure that it's always about what is best for her. Not me. Yes, I still get up twice per night to feed her and it can get exhausting. But I just go to bed earlier in the evening (except tonight! aaaahhhhh I need to go to bed!!!) so I can get some sort of sleep. These days will pass eventually and I will get a full night of uninterrupted sleep again at some point. Maybe in another 18 years, but it will happen. Hah! But seriously... I'm happy, baby's happy, hubby's happy. My puppy may be happy too... poor thing. She used to be the center of the universe, and now she's not. I try to make it up to her by sacrificing my foot room in bed so she can have her very own pillow to lay on. She likes it, and I like to think that it somehow makes up for the decrease in attention she gets.
Alright. Now I'm rambling. Time to face-plant into bed.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Milestones
I just realized I have a six pack of Woodchuck Granny Smith Hard Cider in the fridge. Commence enjoyment.
Tomorrow is World Prematurity Day! AND- the March of Dimes petition to light the White House with purple lights for preemies on 1/3/13 has all of the signatures it needed. Woohoo! I've put more thought into gathering a team to do a prematurity walk and I'm definitely going to do it. There are plenty of people who have expressed interest and I would love to give back to the organizations that helped save my daughter's life.
Onto the Emma stuff:
She amazes me every day. I watch her in awe as she learns new (and usually major) things and it's clear that she's really picking up on her surroundings. We had our first "conversation" the other night while she was taking a bath- she looked up at me and smiled, so I smiled back and made a little noise at her. She grinned from ear to ear, raised up her head a little, and made a noise back. We went back and forth like this about five times and she was so tickled by the whole thing. And last night, the little goofball started splashing like a crazy fool in her bath, then looked up at me and noticed that I was smiling and laughing. So she smiled and laughed, then splashed some more. She paused, saw me laughing again, and splashed again. I do believe that my little Emma intentionally made me laugh for the first time ever! She's also rapidly learning how to grasp onto things. If you put something in or near her hand, she'll grab onto it and bring it to her mouth. She loves trying to catch her toys on her playmat as they swing or try to slowly raise her hand to grab onto them. The problem is that she still doesn't have complete control over her movements, so she sometimes ends up throwing things unintentionally or punching her toys when she's trying to grab them. Case in point: this morning, my mom put a little plush rattle in Emma's hand and she grasped it. Her arm jerked and her fingers let go, and she ended up throwing the rattle directly into her face. Her poor face.
Seriously. Her poor face. In addition to poking out her eyeballs constantly, she still scratches herself and sometimes draws blood in doing so. And because of how handsy she is now, she also has a tendency to punch herself and now apparently throw things at her face. Never her chest. Always her face.
Emma's 4 month well-child visit was on 11-13 and it went so well. She weighed 13 pounds 4oz- her growth has slowed but she's still catching up to her actual age standards and is now in the 39th percentile for weight! She's still short and fat though ;) She is meeting all of her milestones too and the doctor and nurse were so happy with her progress. She got her shots, and the poor thing tensed up right when she got the first one and started bleeding from it. The second shot was the worst, and she started wailing. That nurse is so quick on the draw, though, and had her all cleaned up with band-aids on in a flash, so that mommy could pick up the baby and cuddle her until she stopped crying. It didn't take long. I asked her what was up with the dramatics coming from the baby that didn't make a peep when her PICC line was removed in the NICU. lol. I hate when she cries like that though, but I'm glad I can soothe her. She's starting to really snuggle into my chest when she's looking for comfort and it's so cute. Sad, but cute.
This morning went down in the record books for most vomit at the worst time. Hubby fed her around 3:00am so I could finally get some sleep. The night before, I was up every hour putting a pacifier in Emma's mouth and patting her until she calmed down because, for some reason, she wasn't able to soothe herself back to sleep when she would awaken between sleep cycles. She usually does that once or twice per night, but the other night was awful. Anyways, hubby came back to bed but heard the little one fussing, so he attempted to give her a pacifier. In the process, Emma was moving all around and ended up gagging on her pacifier (which isn't uncommon for her) and projectile vomited everywhere. And I truly mean everywhere. The carpet in front of her crib was soaked, her sheet was soaked, she was soaked, her crib had vomit all over it. It was a complete mess. I got up to help with the clean up effort and, of course, Emma was just as happy as can be. In fact, she was pretty darned excited and ready to play. I fed her a little more to replace what she had lost, but she was in no way ready for bed. Actually, she wasn't ready for bed when I put her to bed earlier in the night, but she was able to entertain herself to sleep. Hubby went back to bed while I re-fed her, but because she was so rowdy and restless, I ended up setting up camp on the couch so I could shut the bedroom door so hubby could sleep and I could still hear her if she got upset. Wouldn't you figure, I finally get comfy on the couch and she quiets down and goes right to sleep. And by that point, I was so comfy and warm that I didn't feel like getting up and getting into my cold bed, so I just stayed on the couch. I did discover that one of our couch blankets is seriously the most warm and comfy thing I've ever experienced. I'm really contemplating bringing this thing to bed with me every night. If it was so awesome that I chose to stay on the couch vs. sinking back into the Tempurpedic foam, then it's obviously amazing. I'm actually cuddled with it right now ;)
Things are pretty status quo around here. I've sunken into my role as a mommy and feel mostly in control of things again. But I have to say- I am so glad we have our Snuza Halo. It's the breathing/movement monitor that clips onto her diaper while she sleeps. I never worry about her at night because I know that if something happened, the alarm would go off. So if I happen to wake up at 5am and realize she hasn't woken up yet, it's no big deal. I know she's fine! It's priceless peace of mind for someone who's so nutso about SIDS.
Ok, fine. Now for the part you care about most. Pictures.
Tomorrow is World Prematurity Day! AND- the March of Dimes petition to light the White House with purple lights for preemies on 1/3/13 has all of the signatures it needed. Woohoo! I've put more thought into gathering a team to do a prematurity walk and I'm definitely going to do it. There are plenty of people who have expressed interest and I would love to give back to the organizations that helped save my daughter's life.
Onto the Emma stuff:
She amazes me every day. I watch her in awe as she learns new (and usually major) things and it's clear that she's really picking up on her surroundings. We had our first "conversation" the other night while she was taking a bath- she looked up at me and smiled, so I smiled back and made a little noise at her. She grinned from ear to ear, raised up her head a little, and made a noise back. We went back and forth like this about five times and she was so tickled by the whole thing. And last night, the little goofball started splashing like a crazy fool in her bath, then looked up at me and noticed that I was smiling and laughing. So she smiled and laughed, then splashed some more. She paused, saw me laughing again, and splashed again. I do believe that my little Emma intentionally made me laugh for the first time ever! She's also rapidly learning how to grasp onto things. If you put something in or near her hand, she'll grab onto it and bring it to her mouth. She loves trying to catch her toys on her playmat as they swing or try to slowly raise her hand to grab onto them. The problem is that she still doesn't have complete control over her movements, so she sometimes ends up throwing things unintentionally or punching her toys when she's trying to grab them. Case in point: this morning, my mom put a little plush rattle in Emma's hand and she grasped it. Her arm jerked and her fingers let go, and she ended up throwing the rattle directly into her face. Her poor face.
Seriously. Her poor face. In addition to poking out her eyeballs constantly, she still scratches herself and sometimes draws blood in doing so. And because of how handsy she is now, she also has a tendency to punch herself and now apparently throw things at her face. Never her chest. Always her face.
Emma's 4 month well-child visit was on 11-13 and it went so well. She weighed 13 pounds 4oz- her growth has slowed but she's still catching up to her actual age standards and is now in the 39th percentile for weight! She's still short and fat though ;) She is meeting all of her milestones too and the doctor and nurse were so happy with her progress. She got her shots, and the poor thing tensed up right when she got the first one and started bleeding from it. The second shot was the worst, and she started wailing. That nurse is so quick on the draw, though, and had her all cleaned up with band-aids on in a flash, so that mommy could pick up the baby and cuddle her until she stopped crying. It didn't take long. I asked her what was up with the dramatics coming from the baby that didn't make a peep when her PICC line was removed in the NICU. lol. I hate when she cries like that though, but I'm glad I can soothe her. She's starting to really snuggle into my chest when she's looking for comfort and it's so cute. Sad, but cute.
This morning went down in the record books for most vomit at the worst time. Hubby fed her around 3:00am so I could finally get some sleep. The night before, I was up every hour putting a pacifier in Emma's mouth and patting her until she calmed down because, for some reason, she wasn't able to soothe herself back to sleep when she would awaken between sleep cycles. She usually does that once or twice per night, but the other night was awful. Anyways, hubby came back to bed but heard the little one fussing, so he attempted to give her a pacifier. In the process, Emma was moving all around and ended up gagging on her pacifier (which isn't uncommon for her) and projectile vomited everywhere. And I truly mean everywhere. The carpet in front of her crib was soaked, her sheet was soaked, she was soaked, her crib had vomit all over it. It was a complete mess. I got up to help with the clean up effort and, of course, Emma was just as happy as can be. In fact, she was pretty darned excited and ready to play. I fed her a little more to replace what she had lost, but she was in no way ready for bed. Actually, she wasn't ready for bed when I put her to bed earlier in the night, but she was able to entertain herself to sleep. Hubby went back to bed while I re-fed her, but because she was so rowdy and restless, I ended up setting up camp on the couch so I could shut the bedroom door so hubby could sleep and I could still hear her if she got upset. Wouldn't you figure, I finally get comfy on the couch and she quiets down and goes right to sleep. And by that point, I was so comfy and warm that I didn't feel like getting up and getting into my cold bed, so I just stayed on the couch. I did discover that one of our couch blankets is seriously the most warm and comfy thing I've ever experienced. I'm really contemplating bringing this thing to bed with me every night. If it was so awesome that I chose to stay on the couch vs. sinking back into the Tempurpedic foam, then it's obviously amazing. I'm actually cuddled with it right now ;)
Things are pretty status quo around here. I've sunken into my role as a mommy and feel mostly in control of things again. But I have to say- I am so glad we have our Snuza Halo. It's the breathing/movement monitor that clips onto her diaper while she sleeps. I never worry about her at night because I know that if something happened, the alarm would go off. So if I happen to wake up at 5am and realize she hasn't woken up yet, it's no big deal. I know she's fine! It's priceless peace of mind for someone who's so nutso about SIDS.
Ok, fine. Now for the part you care about most. Pictures.
I put her in her jumper on 11-11 for the first time ever and the result was serious cuteness. I imagine one of these will be grandpa's new computer background ;)
Just hanging out.
"Staring contest. Ready... Go."
Apparently her arm tastes good?
"Go home, ducky. You're drunk."
OMG. Too many things to love about this!
4 month photos with the fabulous Miss Stephanie!
Bahahaha! She was so sleepy the day after her shots that she couldn't wake up!
I wish I woke up smiling like this every day.
This was right after she drooled all over my hand.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Feet are for Kicking
This coming Saturday, November 17, is World Prematurity Day (also the adoption picnic for my county!). November happens to be national adoption month AND prematurity awareness month. Two things that are very near and dear to my heart! I've mentioned before that I'm an adoption case manager... and I think this blog makes it quite obvious why I care so much about prematurity.
To avoid being yelled at, here are some pictures of the monster baby.
Here are some quick facts, from the March of Dimes website: 15 million babies are born too early each year and 1.1 million babies die. Yep- more than one million babies. That's a staggering number, and Emma could have easily been one of those babies, which is a very sobering thought for me. Had it not been for the fact that I had chronic hypertension prior to getting pregnant, Emma would probably have been born earlier than she was, and as early as 28 weeks. And at that point, she was less than 3 pounds in weight and her lungs were definitely not ready to work on their own without a ventilator. We're so blessed that, while she's one of the 15 million, she wasn't one of the 1.1 million. Things could have been so much worse if Emma wasn't such a strong, healthy little ninja. So for all of you who know me in real life, you definitely know at least one person affected by premature birth. You know my story- the four weeks of hospital bed rest, the three weeks of NICU hell. But in the end, we have a happy, healthy, feisty little baby to cuddle and love. So many families aren't as fortunate. It breaks my heart to hear stories of loss...
I'm really hoping to be able to participate in a March of Dimes event in the near future. It's because of their fundraising that there are so many good medical advances for premature birth. The kind of technology used in Emma's NICU was mind-blowing and we were so fortunate that we had access to that kind of care. Premature birth is very expensive- Emma's hospital stay cost around $150,000 and she was mostly healthy- she didn't require any surgeries, the ventilator, etc. But had it not been for the discovery of betamethasone shots and their affect on fetal lung development, Emma could have easily required the vent. These breakthroughs have saved countless lives.
So if anyone wants to join me in a March of Dimes event, let me know! I'd love to put together a team at some point for one of their walks... we can all be Emma's team. I know so many of you prayed for Emma and I during my hospital stay and hers, and I think it would be awesome to get everyone together to raise some money for other babies like Emma. And Emma will come too, and being the little celebrity she is, I know people like to see her ;) Who knows, by the time the next walk comes around, Emma will probably be jogging on her own. She's pretty incredible like that.
Alright, PSA complete. Onto the Emma monster and the mommy stuff, although I know you mostly care about the monster. But so do I, so we have that in common ;)
Naptime. Ugh. She is still having difficulty staying asleep in her crib. Sometimes she'll do alright, but for the most part she greatly prefers her swing for naps. I feel like doing one of those victory laps when I'm able to get her to sleep for more than 15 minutes in her crib during the day. My mom, however, can get her to nap for much longer than that. I've done lots of research, as is typical 90210 fashion, and found that it's quite common for babies to have issues sleeping in their cribs during the day. We've darkened her room with a blackout shade but that hasn't appeared to have helped tremendously. The next step is buying a crib soother- I'm already eyeing a few on Amazon. After that? Who knows. Nap Nanny? Standing on our heads? I'll try anything... because she's eventually going to grow out of her swing.
Swing= happy Emma. A big thanks to her "future in-laws" :)
This "preemie" is huge. She has her 4-month well-child exam on 11/13 and I'm curious, as always, to see how big she really is. I think I just need to buy myself a bathroom scale so I don't have to impatiently await doctor's appointments to find out if she really is as fat as I think she is. Fat is cute on a babies though, and I make sure to tell her that after I tell her how fat she is. I don't want her trying to diet or anything. hahaha... I officially packed up her 3 month clothes and moved all of her 3-6 and 6 month sizes into the higher drawers in her dresser. She's also in her size two diapers.
Speaking of diapers. I hate Huggies. Actually, I despise them with every fiber of my motherhood. Emma was in Huggies in the NICU, so we bought a box of newborn size diapers after she came home because we figured they were fine- she didn't have any diaper rash issues in the NICU and they seemed to work just fine. They also weren't too expensive either. It wasn't long before she started peeing right out of them and causing frequent clothing changes, for Emma and whoever happened to be unfortunate enough to be holding her at the time. That got old very quickly. So we switched to Pampers Swaddlers... the gold standard of diapers. Sure, they're more expensive. But my God, they work. Emma has never leaked out of a Swaddlers diaper, and she has had some enormous pee-filled diapers. She doesn't even get close to rashy, because they suck up so much pee that her little bum is still completely dry. I love them, I really do.
So now that we've moved on to her size 2's, it's back to Huggies as we have two boxes of them in her closet. I hoped things would be different now that she's in a bigger size but WRONG. She still pees out of them. She's done it to my mom a few times. Poor grandma. And then yesterday... ugh. I was holding her after I fed her and smelled that all-too-familiar scent of a soiled diaper. Luckily, I had her sitting up in my lap with my hand supporting her upper back. I gave her a few minutes to make sure she was, ahem, done, and then plopped her on her changing pad. I'll spare you the yucky details, but I'll just say this- there was a poo eruption out of the top of her diaper and I didn't realize it until after it smeared up her back and got all over her (super cute) onesie. And this wasn't a monumental sized poo either. Grrrrrrr.
That was the second of her cute onesies that fell victim to being worn by a baby. She has a limited supply of long-sleeved onesies, which has been what I put her in for bed at night along with a SwaddleMe. The other night, most of them were waiting to be washed and I only had a few to choose from- a cute white "mommy's cupcake" one, one with lots of (probably itchy) embroidery on the front, her awesome one with a gold leopard bow printed on the front, and a pink one with ruffles on the front and snaps in the back (pain in the ass at night). I elected the white cupcake one, despite it being one that I wanted to save for her to wear when we go somewhere. But I thought... what's the worst that could happen while she's sleeping? Vomit? That's what OxiClean Free is for! Well, what could happen is this (and I'm sure it's not even the worst that could happen): Emma could rub the scab off of her face that formed after she scratched herself under her eye (THE RIGHT EYE AGAIN!), and then rub the sleeve of her adorable white onesie all in the blood coming from the scratch. Awesome. And then the cute pink ruffled onesie fell victim to the Huggies blowout. I guess Emma is trying to remind me that I shouldn't care so much about her clothes. But, ugh. Baby girl clothes are so stinking cute.
We got a big shipment of Carter's clothes in the mail this week from an online shopping spree I engaged in last weekend. She got a ton of cute outfits that will hopefully last her for a while. I sincerely hope she stops growing at this rate soon, or else she'll be in 12 month sizes in no time. Seriously. It's preposterous. But, without intending to, I picked out two really adorable wintery outfits that are going to be perfect for some Christmas photos. Yay! And we also have a photo shoot scheduled for 11/13 after her doctor's appointment with the fabulous angel-on-earth of a photographer who took her newborn pictures. I seriously can't wait...
In other news, this was my final week of being on-call in my current job, with today being my final day of it. Since on-call rotates between five people, it means I'm usually on-call for a whole week every fifth week. Not that we get many calls, but it's very restricting as I don't like to go out anywhere if I'm on-call. Obviously I don't have an engaging social life right now, but it's nice to feel like I can actually go somewhere without worrying about the phone ringing. I'm much more likely to have calls in my new job, but at least I'll have the phone for shorter periods of time and less often to boot.
Nothing much has really changed otherwise. Although it's amazing to see how things change week-to-week with Emma. She had one week of sleeping all night, and now she's back to having a middle-of-the-night bottle, which is still a big improvement from being up every 2-3 hours on the dot for a bottle or to nurse. That was exhausting. She had also been doing great about a bedtime routine around the same time every night- we were usually able to start her routine anytime between 8:30 and 9pm. Now it's all over the place because her schedule during the day has been erratic. Hopefully she settles into a nice routine soon, for everyone's sake. I experimented a bit tonight and did her routine at 7pm, which is much earlier than normal for her. But she was ready to eat, so I figured it didn't make sense to try to feed her and wait until 10pm, her probable next feed, to put her to bed. So we'll see how long she sleeps before she gets up for another bottle. It could be in 30 minutes, it could be in a few hours.
Her recent big accomplishment has been discovering her feet. She can now willingly kick something with her feet, but it requires an incredible amount of concentration, which is seriously adorable. She stares intently as her little foot slowly kicks whatever is near it. The other night, I put my hand near her feet during her bath and she would kick my hand, then try to curl her toes and feel my fingers as her foot slid down my hand. She was so happy with herself over it. And today, hubby lifted up her feet while she was lying down on the floor and she looked at them and seemingly recognized them, as she kicked her foot straight up in the air and watched it move. They're like brand new toys that are attached to her!
I'm really hoping to be able to participate in a March of Dimes event in the near future. It's because of their fundraising that there are so many good medical advances for premature birth. The kind of technology used in Emma's NICU was mind-blowing and we were so fortunate that we had access to that kind of care. Premature birth is very expensive- Emma's hospital stay cost around $150,000 and she was mostly healthy- she didn't require any surgeries, the ventilator, etc. But had it not been for the discovery of betamethasone shots and their affect on fetal lung development, Emma could have easily required the vent. These breakthroughs have saved countless lives.
So if anyone wants to join me in a March of Dimes event, let me know! I'd love to put together a team at some point for one of their walks... we can all be Emma's team. I know so many of you prayed for Emma and I during my hospital stay and hers, and I think it would be awesome to get everyone together to raise some money for other babies like Emma. And Emma will come too, and being the little celebrity she is, I know people like to see her ;) Who knows, by the time the next walk comes around, Emma will probably be jogging on her own. She's pretty incredible like that.
Alright, PSA complete. Onto the Emma monster and the mommy stuff, although I know you mostly care about the monster. But so do I, so we have that in common ;)
Naptime. Ugh. She is still having difficulty staying asleep in her crib. Sometimes she'll do alright, but for the most part she greatly prefers her swing for naps. I feel like doing one of those victory laps when I'm able to get her to sleep for more than 15 minutes in her crib during the day. My mom, however, can get her to nap for much longer than that. I've done lots of research, as is typical 90210 fashion, and found that it's quite common for babies to have issues sleeping in their cribs during the day. We've darkened her room with a blackout shade but that hasn't appeared to have helped tremendously. The next step is buying a crib soother- I'm already eyeing a few on Amazon. After that? Who knows. Nap Nanny? Standing on our heads? I'll try anything... because she's eventually going to grow out of her swing.
Swing= happy Emma. A big thanks to her "future in-laws" :)
This "preemie" is huge. She has her 4-month well-child exam on 11/13 and I'm curious, as always, to see how big she really is. I think I just need to buy myself a bathroom scale so I don't have to impatiently await doctor's appointments to find out if she really is as fat as I think she is. Fat is cute on a babies though, and I make sure to tell her that after I tell her how fat she is. I don't want her trying to diet or anything. hahaha... I officially packed up her 3 month clothes and moved all of her 3-6 and 6 month sizes into the higher drawers in her dresser. She's also in her size two diapers.
Speaking of diapers. I hate Huggies. Actually, I despise them with every fiber of my motherhood. Emma was in Huggies in the NICU, so we bought a box of newborn size diapers after she came home because we figured they were fine- she didn't have any diaper rash issues in the NICU and they seemed to work just fine. They also weren't too expensive either. It wasn't long before she started peeing right out of them and causing frequent clothing changes, for Emma and whoever happened to be unfortunate enough to be holding her at the time. That got old very quickly. So we switched to Pampers Swaddlers... the gold standard of diapers. Sure, they're more expensive. But my God, they work. Emma has never leaked out of a Swaddlers diaper, and she has had some enormous pee-filled diapers. She doesn't even get close to rashy, because they suck up so much pee that her little bum is still completely dry. I love them, I really do.
So now that we've moved on to her size 2's, it's back to Huggies as we have two boxes of them in her closet. I hoped things would be different now that she's in a bigger size but WRONG. She still pees out of them. She's done it to my mom a few times. Poor grandma. And then yesterday... ugh. I was holding her after I fed her and smelled that all-too-familiar scent of a soiled diaper. Luckily, I had her sitting up in my lap with my hand supporting her upper back. I gave her a few minutes to make sure she was, ahem, done, and then plopped her on her changing pad. I'll spare you the yucky details, but I'll just say this- there was a poo eruption out of the top of her diaper and I didn't realize it until after it smeared up her back and got all over her (super cute) onesie. And this wasn't a monumental sized poo either. Grrrrrrr.
That was the second of her cute onesies that fell victim to being worn by a baby. She has a limited supply of long-sleeved onesies, which has been what I put her in for bed at night along with a SwaddleMe. The other night, most of them were waiting to be washed and I only had a few to choose from- a cute white "mommy's cupcake" one, one with lots of (probably itchy) embroidery on the front, her awesome one with a gold leopard bow printed on the front, and a pink one with ruffles on the front and snaps in the back (pain in the ass at night). I elected the white cupcake one, despite it being one that I wanted to save for her to wear when we go somewhere. But I thought... what's the worst that could happen while she's sleeping? Vomit? That's what OxiClean Free is for! Well, what could happen is this (and I'm sure it's not even the worst that could happen): Emma could rub the scab off of her face that formed after she scratched herself under her eye (THE RIGHT EYE AGAIN!), and then rub the sleeve of her adorable white onesie all in the blood coming from the scratch. Awesome. And then the cute pink ruffled onesie fell victim to the Huggies blowout. I guess Emma is trying to remind me that I shouldn't care so much about her clothes. But, ugh. Baby girl clothes are so stinking cute.
We got a big shipment of Carter's clothes in the mail this week from an online shopping spree I engaged in last weekend. She got a ton of cute outfits that will hopefully last her for a while. I sincerely hope she stops growing at this rate soon, or else she'll be in 12 month sizes in no time. Seriously. It's preposterous. But, without intending to, I picked out two really adorable wintery outfits that are going to be perfect for some Christmas photos. Yay! And we also have a photo shoot scheduled for 11/13 after her doctor's appointment with the fabulous angel-on-earth of a photographer who took her newborn pictures. I seriously can't wait...
In other news, this was my final week of being on-call in my current job, with today being my final day of it. Since on-call rotates between five people, it means I'm usually on-call for a whole week every fifth week. Not that we get many calls, but it's very restricting as I don't like to go out anywhere if I'm on-call. Obviously I don't have an engaging social life right now, but it's nice to feel like I can actually go somewhere without worrying about the phone ringing. I'm much more likely to have calls in my new job, but at least I'll have the phone for shorter periods of time and less often to boot.
Nothing much has really changed otherwise. Although it's amazing to see how things change week-to-week with Emma. She had one week of sleeping all night, and now she's back to having a middle-of-the-night bottle, which is still a big improvement from being up every 2-3 hours on the dot for a bottle or to nurse. That was exhausting. She had also been doing great about a bedtime routine around the same time every night- we were usually able to start her routine anytime between 8:30 and 9pm. Now it's all over the place because her schedule during the day has been erratic. Hopefully she settles into a nice routine soon, for everyone's sake. I experimented a bit tonight and did her routine at 7pm, which is much earlier than normal for her. But she was ready to eat, so I figured it didn't make sense to try to feed her and wait until 10pm, her probable next feed, to put her to bed. So we'll see how long she sleeps before she gets up for another bottle. It could be in 30 minutes, it could be in a few hours.
Her recent big accomplishment has been discovering her feet. She can now willingly kick something with her feet, but it requires an incredible amount of concentration, which is seriously adorable. She stares intently as her little foot slowly kicks whatever is near it. The other night, I put my hand near her feet during her bath and she would kick my hand, then try to curl her toes and feel my fingers as her foot slid down my hand. She was so happy with herself over it. And today, hubby lifted up her feet while she was lying down on the floor and she looked at them and seemingly recognized them, as she kicked her foot straight up in the air and watched it move. They're like brand new toys that are attached to her!
To avoid being yelled at, here are some pictures of the monster baby.
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| She always looks so surprised. |
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| This playmat will forever amuse her. |
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| Mommy and baby! |
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| 11-9-12. 4 months old! |
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| Glamor Shots. |
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| This is what happens when she's been sucking on her pacifier. |
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| Showing off her big girl kicking skills! She loves this ball. |
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Emma's First Halloween
Wanna know what my life has come to? Hubby decided to give Emma her bedtime bottle and get her into bed tonight, and I warned him that she has been a very angry bedtime baby for the last week. I told him he'd probably end up needing to hold her for about 15-20 minutes while she cried, fussed, and kicked, and then he'd have to put her in her crib with her paci and keep putting it back in her mouth until she calmed down to the point where she could put herself to sleep. Wouldn't you figure- she was nice and calm for him. He walked out into the hallway and I asked if she was in bed and he said yes, but he thought she pooped and couldn't tell. So he wanted me to come do a sniff test before he got her up out of her crib and woke her up. Yep. That's my life- awkwardly leaning over the front rail of the crib (I'm super short. So I'm considering investing in a stool, especially for when we have to lower her mattress) and sticking my nose as close to her bum as I can to see if my kid smells farty or poopy. And sure enough- the one night that she goes to bed calmly and quietly, she poops... so hubby had to get her up and change her diaper. Hmph.
Not a whole lot has changed over the last few days. Emma is still a happy, crazy little baby. She had a doctor's appointment on 11/1 and her eye is completely healed, so no more antibiotic drops. Not that they were a big deal, because she would frequently smile after I put a drop in her eye. She's seriously a weirdo like that.
So while not much has changed over the last few days, I'm constantly reminded of how much has changed in such a short amount of time. It was just three months and two days ago that she came home from the NICU and both hubby and I were excited and terrified at the concept of having a five-pound preemie on a cardiorespiratory monitor to care for around the clock with no nurses to swoop in when things got hairy. The stress of it all was crushing and I had many days when I wasn't quite sure I'd make it out in one piece- I was certain I'd lose my mind in the least. I was also completely overwhelmed with new motherhood, on top of having major issues with breastfeeding and dealing with repeated "Apparent Life-Threatening Events" with almost every feed. I did a little internet research recently on SIDS and was reading about apnea, and found out that the bradys she was having fell into that category. I mean, it was obvious that the events put her on the brink of no return, but it's still scary to think about it. Anyways. Within the last few weeks, I've really settled into my role as a mommy and adjusted to the routine. I've accepted the fact that I'll get very little accomplished in my "free time" and that it's ok. Some things can just wait. AND. I'm getting more sleep. That always helps... so add all of this up, and you have a much happier mommy.
Oh, and I'm transferring back "home" at work. This was the "stress" reference of a previous post- I'm trading stress for stress. But a different kind of stress- a higher workload. Much higher. But less driving, more opportunity for advancement, and some pretty awesome coworkers. I think it'll be a good change... but I'll kind of miss the scenic area I work in now. I grew up in a part of Florida with zero elevation change, and where I work now has some beautiful rolling hills and lots of pastures and open land. Oh well. I can always visit.
I mentioned I'm getting more sleep. Hallelujah. Over this past week, Emma has dropped her middle-of-the-night feed. She suddenly started sleeping longer and getting up around 1:30-3:00am for a bottle, then again around 5 or 6. But for the past few nights, she's been sleeping for longer and longer stretches. In fact, she was asleep in bed by 10:30 last night (she was actually in bed around 9:30 but fussed off and on for about an hour) and woke up at 5:30am. I usually give her a few minutes after the first grunt to make sure she's really awake, but this time she went right back to sleep and slept until 6am. Seven and a half hours of sleep. Straight. OMG. I actually went to bed at about the time she fell asleep, so we both got some good sleep last night. Hubby let me sleep in, so I caught up on some much needed slumber. I'm trying not to get too used to this though, as I know she can easily enter another growth spurt and start waking in the middle of the night to feed again. But I realized that an interrupted sleep has become the norm for me (part of that adjustment thing)... I've had plenty of days when I've thought "why the heck am I so tired? I got seven hours of sleep last night..." and then I realized "oh wait. I still had to be up to feed her in the middle of the night." I forget that, despite getting an adequate quantity of sleep, the quality hasn't been great. For about a week, I was having to get up when she'd start to fuss to give her the pacifier so she'd sleep for another hour before getting up to feed (I give her the paci when she's fussy and hungry so she doesn't get too worked up while I get her bottle ready. But after a few nights of returning to the nursery to find a fully asleep baby, I decided it was worth my time to get up and give her the paci and wait to see if she fell back asleep, which she usually does), then get up an hour later to feed her. This would usually happen twice before it was mommy's wake-up time. So my sleep quality has been lacking.
What I wouldn't give for about 10-12 hours of completely uninterrupted sleep. That's what I want for Christmas- a night in a hotel room ;) I'm just kidding- I really don't want to spend a night away from her. Even in the middle of the night, I have to refrain from squeezing the living daylights out of her because I just love her so much and want to cuddle and squish her. She's very squishy. And so cute.
Emma's first Halloween was great! We didn't put her in a costume, as Halloween in Florida is typically very warm. And baby costumes are generally made for colder climates. I just couldn't see spending money on a costume that she could only wear for pictures because she'd be roasting in it otherwise. And of course, thanks to hurricane Sandy, it was nice and nippy on Halloween. But her Great Gramma Betty sent an adorable little Halloween outfit for her, which we paired with her pumpkin hat from her Great Aunt Linda. Halloween in my neighborhood is pretty big business- most of the people sit in their driveways and hand out candy and mobs (literally mobs) of children make their way around. We also have a few Sheriff deputies that patrol with their lights on for safety. It's pretty awesome- The kids have a great time and it's a very safe neighborhood, so it's just a good night all-around. This year, we sat out in the driveway with Emma, who was surprisingly interested in what was going on. She got fussy when it was time to eat, but was otherwise content to look at all of her "friends" who came to get candy. We also (finally) met some of the neighbors and had a chat about things. They are very nice people... I love our neighborhood! With the exception of the weed-whacking neighbors, but that's another story for another day. Emma ended up falling asleep in my arms towards the end, and the mobs of children scampered back into their own homes just in time for Emma's bath (and just in time for us to run out of candy, even the reserves I put off to the side for hubby and I to eat).
Photosforyou.
Not a whole lot has changed over the last few days. Emma is still a happy, crazy little baby. She had a doctor's appointment on 11/1 and her eye is completely healed, so no more antibiotic drops. Not that they were a big deal, because she would frequently smile after I put a drop in her eye. She's seriously a weirdo like that.
So while not much has changed over the last few days, I'm constantly reminded of how much has changed in such a short amount of time. It was just three months and two days ago that she came home from the NICU and both hubby and I were excited and terrified at the concept of having a five-pound preemie on a cardiorespiratory monitor to care for around the clock with no nurses to swoop in when things got hairy. The stress of it all was crushing and I had many days when I wasn't quite sure I'd make it out in one piece- I was certain I'd lose my mind in the least. I was also completely overwhelmed with new motherhood, on top of having major issues with breastfeeding and dealing with repeated "Apparent Life-Threatening Events" with almost every feed. I did a little internet research recently on SIDS and was reading about apnea, and found out that the bradys she was having fell into that category. I mean, it was obvious that the events put her on the brink of no return, but it's still scary to think about it. Anyways. Within the last few weeks, I've really settled into my role as a mommy and adjusted to the routine. I've accepted the fact that I'll get very little accomplished in my "free time" and that it's ok. Some things can just wait. AND. I'm getting more sleep. That always helps... so add all of this up, and you have a much happier mommy.
Oh, and I'm transferring back "home" at work. This was the "stress" reference of a previous post- I'm trading stress for stress. But a different kind of stress- a higher workload. Much higher. But less driving, more opportunity for advancement, and some pretty awesome coworkers. I think it'll be a good change... but I'll kind of miss the scenic area I work in now. I grew up in a part of Florida with zero elevation change, and where I work now has some beautiful rolling hills and lots of pastures and open land. Oh well. I can always visit.
I mentioned I'm getting more sleep. Hallelujah. Over this past week, Emma has dropped her middle-of-the-night feed. She suddenly started sleeping longer and getting up around 1:30-3:00am for a bottle, then again around 5 or 6. But for the past few nights, she's been sleeping for longer and longer stretches. In fact, she was asleep in bed by 10:30 last night (she was actually in bed around 9:30 but fussed off and on for about an hour) and woke up at 5:30am. I usually give her a few minutes after the first grunt to make sure she's really awake, but this time she went right back to sleep and slept until 6am. Seven and a half hours of sleep. Straight. OMG. I actually went to bed at about the time she fell asleep, so we both got some good sleep last night. Hubby let me sleep in, so I caught up on some much needed slumber. I'm trying not to get too used to this though, as I know she can easily enter another growth spurt and start waking in the middle of the night to feed again. But I realized that an interrupted sleep has become the norm for me (part of that adjustment thing)... I've had plenty of days when I've thought "why the heck am I so tired? I got seven hours of sleep last night..." and then I realized "oh wait. I still had to be up to feed her in the middle of the night." I forget that, despite getting an adequate quantity of sleep, the quality hasn't been great. For about a week, I was having to get up when she'd start to fuss to give her the pacifier so she'd sleep for another hour before getting up to feed (I give her the paci when she's fussy and hungry so she doesn't get too worked up while I get her bottle ready. But after a few nights of returning to the nursery to find a fully asleep baby, I decided it was worth my time to get up and give her the paci and wait to see if she fell back asleep, which she usually does), then get up an hour later to feed her. This would usually happen twice before it was mommy's wake-up time. So my sleep quality has been lacking.
What I wouldn't give for about 10-12 hours of completely uninterrupted sleep. That's what I want for Christmas- a night in a hotel room ;) I'm just kidding- I really don't want to spend a night away from her. Even in the middle of the night, I have to refrain from squeezing the living daylights out of her because I just love her so much and want to cuddle and squish her. She's very squishy. And so cute.
Emma's first Halloween was great! We didn't put her in a costume, as Halloween in Florida is typically very warm. And baby costumes are generally made for colder climates. I just couldn't see spending money on a costume that she could only wear for pictures because she'd be roasting in it otherwise. And of course, thanks to hurricane Sandy, it was nice and nippy on Halloween. But her Great Gramma Betty sent an adorable little Halloween outfit for her, which we paired with her pumpkin hat from her Great Aunt Linda. Halloween in my neighborhood is pretty big business- most of the people sit in their driveways and hand out candy and mobs (literally mobs) of children make their way around. We also have a few Sheriff deputies that patrol with their lights on for safety. It's pretty awesome- The kids have a great time and it's a very safe neighborhood, so it's just a good night all-around. This year, we sat out in the driveway with Emma, who was surprisingly interested in what was going on. She got fussy when it was time to eat, but was otherwise content to look at all of her "friends" who came to get candy. We also (finally) met some of the neighbors and had a chat about things. They are very nice people... I love our neighborhood! With the exception of the weed-whacking neighbors, but that's another story for another day. Emma ended up falling asleep in my arms towards the end, and the mobs of children scampered back into their own homes just in time for Emma's bath (and just in time for us to run out of candy, even the reserves I put off to the side for hubby and I to eat).
Photosforyou.
She's so funny when she stretches.
This is her "victory shall be mine" pose
Emma's pumpkin
Hubby has an app on his phone that puts a mustache on a picture. I can't get over how hilarious this is.
Toy slam.
This was her Halloween outfit
Six month jammies!
Sleeping in mommy's arms on 11/3 :)
Alright- I have GOT to get some house cleaning done before these dust bunnies grow legs.
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Pumpkin Patch Emma
I figured out how Emma poked her eyeball out- she is working diligently on perfecting her thumb-sucking skills. However, she's still not quite there yet and hasn't realized that it's much more effective to curl the rest of her fingers into a fist. Instead, she elects to have her fingers straight and can't fully keep her hand steady yet, so she ends up looking like a hot mess trying to suck on her thumb. And in the process of doing so, her little fingers go here, there, and everywhere and eventually end up in her eye. I watched her do it today on her changing pad... crying and eye watering ensued, but not as bad as the first time. Her right eye will be lucky if it survives to see (pun intended) her first birthday.
We downgraded her to gowns with fold-down sleeves (dubbed the "Mitt Romneys." Not that I like Mitt Romney. But I figured it was an appropriate name during election time), as she still somehow fits into her 0-3 month size gowns, so that we could cover that mischievous right hand to prevent further corneal abrasions. I think she's going to be right-handed. That hand is seriously out of control, and her left hand is pretty docile these days. She also seems to kick more wildly with her right leg when she's excited.
I'm starting to see bits of her little personality starting to show through. She seems to be a little goofball, just like her mommy and daddy. I put her eye drops in her eye this morning which prompted her to immediately shut her eyes. She started blinking with all of her might, then smiled as a mixture of eye drops and tears streamed from her right eye. I don't know how she was so amused by it, but apparently she was. What a weirdo.
Within the last few days, she has discovered that she can splash in her bath. It started with some kicks, and the other night (the night before last) it escalated to an all-out splash fest. It's quite hilarious- she starts kicking her legs and getting the water to really get moving, then she gets so tickled by the fact that she's splashing that she starts flailing her little arms and eventually her whole body starts wiggling and bouncing from kicking so hard. She then stops and rests for a bit, then does it all over again. I need to start wearing a rain poncho during bath time.
Today was the first of our holiday fun times. We took her to the pumpkin patch and picked out an Emma pumpkin and a mommy and daddy pumpkin. In fact, this was the first time hubby and I have been to a pumpkin patch together... so it was a pretty special day. It was surprisingly chilly (ok, chilly for Florida. It was probably about 75 degrees) and windy so Emma got to wear her special pumpkin hat made by her Great Aunt Linda. We got a few pictures of our sleepy little girl then picked our gourds and headed home. Mission accomplished- pick pumpkins, take pictures of her in ridiculously cute hat. There was another little kid there with a pumpkin hat but... well... Emma's was way cuter! ;)
I'm trying to get as much life out of her three month sized clothes as possible, but I think I need to start putting them away and replacing them with her 3-6 and 6 month sized clothes. Yep. My 4lb 5oz preemie is just about ready for her 6 month sized clothes and she's only 3 1/2 months old. Actual age. My God.
PUMPKIN PICTURES! But first, some non-pumpkin pictures of my pumpkin. Then pumpkin pumpkin pictures.
We downgraded her to gowns with fold-down sleeves (dubbed the "Mitt Romneys." Not that I like Mitt Romney. But I figured it was an appropriate name during election time), as she still somehow fits into her 0-3 month size gowns, so that we could cover that mischievous right hand to prevent further corneal abrasions. I think she's going to be right-handed. That hand is seriously out of control, and her left hand is pretty docile these days. She also seems to kick more wildly with her right leg when she's excited.
I'm starting to see bits of her little personality starting to show through. She seems to be a little goofball, just like her mommy and daddy. I put her eye drops in her eye this morning which prompted her to immediately shut her eyes. She started blinking with all of her might, then smiled as a mixture of eye drops and tears streamed from her right eye. I don't know how she was so amused by it, but apparently she was. What a weirdo.
Within the last few days, she has discovered that she can splash in her bath. It started with some kicks, and the other night (the night before last) it escalated to an all-out splash fest. It's quite hilarious- she starts kicking her legs and getting the water to really get moving, then she gets so tickled by the fact that she's splashing that she starts flailing her little arms and eventually her whole body starts wiggling and bouncing from kicking so hard. She then stops and rests for a bit, then does it all over again. I need to start wearing a rain poncho during bath time.
Today was the first of our holiday fun times. We took her to the pumpkin patch and picked out an Emma pumpkin and a mommy and daddy pumpkin. In fact, this was the first time hubby and I have been to a pumpkin patch together... so it was a pretty special day. It was surprisingly chilly (ok, chilly for Florida. It was probably about 75 degrees) and windy so Emma got to wear her special pumpkin hat made by her Great Aunt Linda. We got a few pictures of our sleepy little girl then picked our gourds and headed home. Mission accomplished- pick pumpkins, take pictures of her in ridiculously cute hat. There was another little kid there with a pumpkin hat but... well... Emma's was way cuter! ;)
I'm trying to get as much life out of her three month sized clothes as possible, but I think I need to start putting them away and replacing them with her 3-6 and 6 month sized clothes. Yep. My 4lb 5oz preemie is just about ready for her 6 month sized clothes and she's only 3 1/2 months old. Actual age. My God.
PUMPKIN PICTURES! But first, some non-pumpkin pictures of my pumpkin. Then pumpkin pumpkin pictures.
Holding up her head like a champ!
Sucking her thumb while pondering the universe.
PUMPKIN HAT.
Wearing her new sweater from Grammy!
"Listen up. This here pumpkin is mine. Mess with my pumpkin and you'll regret it."
Sitting on the pumpkin confused her.
She was quite drawn to the bright orange around her.
Hilarious.
LOVE HER.
I don't know why she kept making mob boss faces.
"I'm too fabulous for this."
We took Miss Stephanie's advice about the yellow shirt :)
Mommy and her lil pumpkin.
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